Life presents us with two choices: we can either take ownership of our circumstances or fall into the victim mindset trap. Gratitude is a key factor that determines which path we take. This principle is best illustrated through my own personal journey—the tale of two careers.

Career A: A Mindset of Gratitude and Ownership

Coming out of high school, my dream was to earn a full-ride football scholarship to a top university. Instead, I had only two options: walk on at Washington State University with no guarantee of playing time or take an unpaid spot at Cornell. The situation was far from ideal, but I chose to see the opportunity rather than the obstacles. 

I embraced the challenge, betting on myself and working harder than ever. Despite starting as the fifth quarterback on the depth chart and facing countless struggles—from grueling weight room sessions, to getting banned from taking a scout team rep, to not being able to eat with the team—I focused on what I could control. I met with coaches, studied film, and put in extra work on and off the field. My gratitude for simply having the opportunity to play fueled my relentless pursuit of improvement.

Through persistence and discipline, I climbed the depth chart. Eventually, I earned a full scholarship, became the starting quarterback, and went on to break records at Washington State and in the Pac-12. This was possible because my mindset was one of gratitude and Taking Ownership—I chose to see the glass as full and took control of my circumstances.

Career B: The Victim Mindset and the Downward Spiral

After my junior season, I was projected to be drafted in the second or third round of the NFL draft according to my agent. When my name was finally called in the sixth round after my senior season, I felt embarrassed and resentful. Instead of being grateful for the opportunity, I focused on what I perceived as an injustice. This sense of entitlement led me down a negative path.

Unlike in college, I didn't take ownership of my development. I didn't put in extra work, didn’t study as I should have, and blamed external factors for my struggles. "The NFL is political, they don't give guys like me a chance." My negative mindset affected my performance, my relationships, and ultimately my career. Instead of thriving, I ‘victim’d’ my way out of the NFL in just a year and a half.

The crazy thing, looking back on it, is that in college, I paid $25k+ for the privilege of being the 5th QB on the depth chart and was immensely grateful for the opportunity. Vs. in the NFL, I was getting paid hundreds of thousands of dollars and chose to focus on all that I lacked. The difference between my college and professional career wasn’t talent—it was mindset. In college, gratitude kept me motivated, disciplined, and resilient. In the NFL, entitlement and victim thinking led me to failure. 

The Power of Gratitude

When we focus on what we lack, we set ourselves up for disappointment and a victim mentality. But when we focus on what we have—our opportunities, relationships, and blessings—we cultivate a mindset of ownership and success.

Ask yourself: are you focusing on what’s missing, or are you grateful for what you have? Gratitude doesn’t mean settling—it means appreciating the present while working toward the future.

I like to remind myself now daily to “Water the grass beneath my feet as I continue to walk forward.” This means being grateful for where I am and what I have as I continue to strive to reach my full God-given potential.

Mind Strength Skill:

• Gratitude Mindset
  • Focus on all the things you DO have rather than what you perceive you are lacking or what you are missing.

Mind Strength Workout: Practicing Gratitude Daily

To develop a gratitude mindset, try this simple exercise:

1. Each morning, take a few deep breaths and think of three things you are grateful for.
   • Visualize them clearly in your mind.
   • If you prefer, write them down.

By doing this consistently, you will shift your focus from lack to abundance and keep yourself from falling into the victim mindset trap.

"Wear gratitude like a cloak, and it will feed every corner of your life." – Rumi